Death

Sometimes November is not a easy month for me, my mother passed away in November 10 years ago. The first 5 years after mom was gone I was very aware of the day she passed it was stuck in my mind. A few days ago one of my friends told me her mother had passed away and then I got a phone call from my sister telling me an uncle of mine was getting ready to go. I remember looking at the calendar and see the day and noticing the day of my mothers death was fast approaching as well.

I’ve learned grief  comes in waves and over the years the intensity lessens, this year it hit me hard, I was walking around in a fog for a day. Looking back now I can see I was concerned about a friend who has some health challenges at this time and I was afraid of losing her, because she means so much to me.

Sometimes I wish I did not care so deeply when I connect with someone.  Death has taught me to tell the ones I love they are appreciated in my life and I do not miss the opportunity to let those close to me know that I care for them and they are deeply appreciated and their friendships are valued.

Death is a good thing, it reminds us to live this life to the fullest, with passion and not to coast through it half a sleep. Sometimes it hurts loving another, but I will not close myself off from the joys of loving. Some days it is hard to stand tall and walk with purpose and on those days I crawl, until I can stand again tall and strong. Some days I fall and just want to lie there and never get up again, yet I find myself getting backup and dusting myself off no matter how I feel and I take the next step again.

I like what WInston Churchill said, ‘Never, Never, Never give up’. It  is in the hardest, most painful of times of our lives we find our strength and we learn the lessons of faith.

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One Response to “Death”

  1. Grief coming in waves is so true. I struggle with never never never giving up. Sometimes I feel like when I leave myself open to love others, I’ve given up on myself.

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